The Things They Carried

The things they carried were based on weight. A wildland firefighter’s pack weighs 45 pounds fully kitted out. Sawyer`s packs weigh more. They contain all the necessary tools used to fight brush fires: fuses for backfiring; extra parachute cord; headlamps and spare radio batteries; two days’ worth of rations; and above all, our fire shelters.

We all carried our Incident Response Pocket Guides in our helmet webbing; they contained complete instructions for how to be a firefighter. We used that thing all the time.

I carried the chainsaw once on a PT hike; it weighs about 35 pounds plus cigs, wedges, saw pack, and felling tool. I don’t remember if I went very fast; all I recall is that I went all the way.

Waylon carried a Jetboil strapped to the webbing of his fire pack, so he could have coffee and ramen noodles on the line.

James carried extra food and water, because he knew some rookie wasn’t going to have enough, while Engleka stripped his MREs of useless stuff like chewing gum and crackers to only carry the main ration packets and cut down on pack weight. James Rule was our squaddie, after all, everyone’s older brother.

Will carried a hunting poncho for the rain. I took it once and wore it in a storm, then hid it from him for days. It started a war that went on all season, and he called me an inappropriate name when I finally gave it back out of guilt.

Barkhouse carried postcards from all the ranger districts we’d visit. He sent them to his girlfriend listing the names we called him. I can only remember a few: Don Birdhouse; Dave Bitchhouse III; Dick Butthause; Bark Doghouse; Damn Whorehouse on 3rd.. He carried a lamb with a broken leg to our EMT once. Joe, one of our squaddies, teased that he looked like Jesus coming down the mountain.

Tim Arrington carried the medkit, since he went to college. All the biologists end up working fire. It requires a GED and pays more.

Matt Brask carried the belt weather kit; they had him sling it in the snow once to see if the ground was still wet, and he actually did it. He also carried the monkeypaw, I recall, which is this little handrake we use to clean chaff off the handline. Don’t diss it or they’ll make you carry it.

Chris Cole carried the kuth notebook, containing a record of all the dumb stuff we did on the crew. I got kuthed 27 times in my first month.

Sherrick carried his cellphone in a plastic baggie on project work. His little brother Dylan carried his IRPG in his back pocket so he could flip it out in a pinch and give his bro the answers when he was doing his squad boss training. He also carried a Pulaski he’d named “The Pooper Scooper,” carved it into the hickory hilt with a dremel. Caroll carried one too, but his was named “Optimus Prime.”

Amanda carried a Leatherman she’d been given for 10 years of distinguished service. It was nice to know that if you worked 10 years you’d get a multitool. Maybe after 20 you’d get a pay raise. If anything, they should have given Amanda her own crew but seeing as we all followed her lead anyway, in many ways they probably] did.

I carried a Swiss Army knife that my dad gave me when I was six. He said every kid ought to have a knife. My crewmembers teased that they’d had one of those in boy scouts. I dropped it in the Snake River by accident and was very distraught. But I realized that if I lost it in the river, the river wanted something to remember me by.

Wabo carried a slingshot he used to hunt voles on the line. I never saw him use it, but he claimed that’s what it was for. I’ve heard that we used to be able to carry guns on the line until a legendary crew boss held his firefighters at gunpoint in a cave during a burnover. He saved their lives, and as a result, no more firearms.

Cy didn’t carry a tent, so I thought it was OK for me to not carry one either. I got caught in a rainstorm on Rirey Ridge and the whole crew laughed. After I dried off, I did too.

Willie “Bing-Bong” Bingman carried an emergency bivvy that rolled up to the size of his fist. I remembered this when I joined a new crew years later, and everyone with bulky tents stared in awe of my ingenious sleeping system.

Matt Workman carried extra chewing tobacco. I don’t think I ever saw him without a dip in. He said he’d sell it for markup at firecamp to the inmate crews but I’ll bet that was baloney. I saw him cut a tree down with a boyaxe once for kicks, so I know he wasn’t bs-ing.

Bitz carried dairy shakes that came with select MREs Those things were currency on the line.

Justin Engleka carried an apple fritter he’d gotten when we were on per diem and it was day 11 of a 14-day roll. Some ruthless bastard stole it and he went around interrogating the entire crew for its whereabouts. I confess this here and now, after carrying it on my chest for almost 10 years. It was me. I did it. I took Engleka’s apple fritter.

I lost touch with all of them after we dispersed, went to different crews, scattered across the country.

James Rule carried us all.

Nicole Pepaj is a wildland firefighter with a hotshot crew in the U.S. Forest Service. Pepaj has a degree in journalism form Santa Monica College. Her article is reminiscent of the 1990 collection of short stories, The Things they Carried, by Tim O’Brien, about a platoon of U.S. soldiers in Vietnam.